07 April 2016
"Everyone is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Be kind."
1. I was totally in despair.
2. Shits happened and I can't seems to cope with any.
3. I had a series of bad thoughts running over my head recently.
4. Last week was the worst. I was watching tv and suddenly, I started to cry like nobody's business. I went up to take wudu' and perform my isya'. I had an emotional breakdown. I felt like my world is gonna end. I meet Him. I whined and told Him everything. I was thinking to do some bad things. I was so scared. I was alone. I hated myself so much. Why am I acting so fragile. I am better, I know I am. I did a lot of self-talk. Tried to get myself back to reality. I felt so fucked up! But I managed to handle it anyways.
5. I woke up the next day, I felt so empty. I have lost my soul.
6. I'm trying to get my shits back.
7. No I won't do self-harm nor am suicidal. Its just that, I just wanna get rid of all the pains. And it seems like that's the easiest thing to do. No? I know.
8. I'm good. I'll be alright.
9. Ironically, I'm a psychology student, I learnt how to deal with stress and such but I can't even handle depression?
I'm only human, people.
10. I just want to get back to my senses. I miss me.
If you know me personally. Don't come and ask me, am I doing well. Please. Do pray for me instead. I need it, a lot.